Sunday, May 1, 2016

Thank You, You Changed My Life- Two Year-Authorversary Post

Two things need to be said to preface what I fear might be an extremely mushy blog post

1) Extreme mushiness makes me super uncomfortable. So uncomfortable in fact, that if you happen to be reading this- you should probably be extremely impressed that I managed to hit the publish button when I was done typing.

2) I do not get very personal on this blog very often, and the main reason for that is that a lot of RL people know my pen name, and while they love to support me in every new book and accomplishment and experience, they do it because they are good friends and they love me, not because they agree with me, and I don't want to make them uncomfortable by inviting them into my bedroom.

Everybody caught up? Okay, prepare for mushiness.

Tonight I was emailing a friend about ways we could encourage each other in encouraging our spouses (Yes, Didi, that would be you) and I typed the sentence "Changing the way I viewed submission changed my life"

And as soon as I typed it I was blown away by how completely true that was in so many little ways that I had never fully added up before. Truly- it did not just change my marriage- it literally changed my life.

In the very beginning of 2011 I had two young kids, my hubby and I worked opposite shifts and both of us were essentially single parents when we weren't working. It was a choice we had made, but it wasn't always an easy one. Without going into a lot of epically stupid details that added up to us both being miserable, I will say that on New Years day, it blew up into a huge fight- and the d word was on the table. And the next day, I went on facebook, and a friend had posted a link to a very disparaging article about spanked wives. That article led me to another article, which led me to blogs, which I spent months devouring, which eventually led me to the LDD network, where I eventually met Patty Devlin- (who btw- was not even published by Blushing at this point) And Patty encouraged me to write- and kept encouraging me for years, until one day, I finally sat down and did it.

And here I am- eleven books later- a completely different person that I was five years ago. My marriage is strong, I love the person I am, and I actually acheived a goal I had since I was nine years old of being a published author.

The funny things is- I have no idea why that friend posted that article- I don't think she intended it in a positive light, but she never said and I never asked, and we aren't even friends anymore.
But she did- so though  she will never see this- I want to say Thank you, you changed my life.

And to the commenter that had the grace to link to a much more diplomatic article, Thank you, you changed my life.

And to the author of the second article, who mentioned the blogs that I spent months reading- Thank you- you chaned my life.

And to the authors of those blogs who put their deepest thoughts, desires, fears and experiences out there for the world to see- Thank You, You changed my life.

And to the creator of the network, and the friends I met there, including Patty- Thank You, You changed my life.

I could seriously keep going on this forever. One little article posted for no apparent reason set off a course of events that changed everything. And tonight- on my two year author-versary, I am just reeling with the impact that small little thing that the poster probably doesnt even remember set me on the course of events that brought me here.

Wow. I just feel so incredibly thankful, and blessed right now.


  1. A tiny twist of fate had a big impact.


  2. This is beautiful. I love that one "chance" post by your friend changed the trajectory of not just your marriage but your life. So cool.

    #NoMush #selfcontrol #ImAmazing

  3. I had a very similar experience. One small comment somewhere online got my curiosity up, and my life was changed forever, in a very similar way. Amazing how that happens. I'm happy for you. :)